On Winning and Influencing
What if you could have everything that you want? No restrictions - wouldn’t you be happier? What if you could discover a formula or script that could enable this? All you need to do is betray yourself.
This sort of rhetoric is the forte of countless bureaucrats, influencers, and “entrepreneurs.” Everyone wants their book deal.
“Listen to me and you’ll gain the world - I can give you everything that you desire. I can make you whole.”
All of this sounds rather sinister beyond the superficial, candy-coated verbiage.
I was recently listening to an old Alan Watts lecture, in which he addresses the contents of “How to Win Friends and Influence People,” in a sort of roundabout way.
The core premise of that book, and others like it, relies on manipulation. It’s a guidebook on how to act like an outgoing, interesting, and soulful person – while really operating from a position of disingenuity and self-concern. The irony of the whole concept is that when a person has to feign depth of character, they’re generally profoundly uninteresting to begin with. The discerning eye recognizes that they’re an automaton of sorts, regurgitating talking points and attempting to goad you towards their predetermined goals.
That’s why many of the foremost media personalities, despite the polished outfits, and the forced smiles, and the one-liners, reek of something artificial. It’s a lack of genuine care, a lack of true vitality – a lack of spirit. The lights are on but nobody’s home.
Any book, or course, or method, that claims to develop positive life outcomes through assumption of an artificial demeanor is bad, bad news. Authenticity is increasingly rare, but it’s all that you need.
You have your own unique affinities, talents, and qualities – utilize them. You don’t need to behave like a used car salesman. The concept itself, upon further review, is worthy of a laugh.
It’s a bit like an alien creature receiving a brief before entering human society.
“Alright - act like you care, mimic the other humans, and ask them about their lives – can you grok that?”
Be genuine and raw. Find what inspires you and follow it to the ends of the earth.
